I stopped trying. Life has never been better.
And that is so fucking weird. I mean, on one level, it feels strange not doing anything, or not having to do anything. Not feeling like I have to run on the treadmill. And it’s not like it is forever. It is at most (at the moment) a month or two. I am blessed to be able to feel like this on so little. But essentially, I’m in that zone.
I’ve stopped trying. As an experiment. As a way of life? As a response to all I’ve been processing lately. And then the universe just provides. Seems unfair. But at the same time, isnt this a welcome breather. It’s been litty for a decade plus. It’s been a lot of pushing, a lot of trying, a lot of striving. For okay results. And now, without trying, things are great.
Maybe it’s not trying per se. Maybe it is giving in to the flow of the universe. Or maybe it is just a great season. Those do happen.
Whatever it is. At this point, I also face the way I feel about work. About the aversion to clients. When you work in this way, you have many bosses. All with their own idiosyncrasies, and traits. It is a creative prostitution, whoring yourself out to whatever is asking.
I think what is needed is a shift to creativity with vision, with a point, or as art. Then what you are doing is inviting the audience into your world, into your philosophy, your vision.
The whole thesis behind not trying, is to say that when you let go, when you learn to surf the flow of the universe, that you can get superior results with less effort. You can be at the right place at the right time. You can exploit the right opportunity.
The art of not trying is not a call to lie by the banks of the river, it is a call to relax into the flow of the currents. Giving in, relaxing into what is happening now and flowing with it, using the energy as appropriate.
And that is the unique distinction. Because you still gotta work. You still gotta create. To not do so will leave you dark and depressed. Stale and frustrated.
If you want to do new things, then do it. If there are parts of you that want to figure out what it would be like to spend a whole day immersed in art, painting and making, then so be it. Give it the space for that to happen. Give the things you feel, space to happen. Sometimes that will happen easily and spontaneously. At other times you might need to actively create the space. However it goes, give it the space for it to happen.
Do nothing, but leave nothing undone.
The Tao does nothing, but leaves nothing undone.
Lao Tzu
Go with the flow.